Dear god, no. While on the topic of there not being a lot of young, black superheroes, Tyler James Williams from The Walking Dead and Everybody Hates Chris said in an interview with Flicks and the City (via Comicbook) that Jaden Smith has been cast as superhero Static Shock.

“I don’t know… What you’re taking about,” Williams says to Flicks And The City with a knowing smile. “But yeah no, it’s great to see Static Shock is happening with Jaden.”

Ugh.

The only saving grace is this is a live-action digital series Warner Bros. has been developing with Reginald Hudlin, producer of Django Unchained. The only way I’d watch this is if the “electricity-based” powers Jaden has is built up by shuffling his feet on carpet and is just him touching bad guys with his finger before they punch him in the face.

Remember when Jaden Smith wore a white Batman suit to prom? Unless his prom date was a theater major, she probably wasn’t having it. Because no girl likes to be upstaged.

Well, there’s a method to Smith’s madness. By ‘madness’, we mean ‘retardation’.

From GQ:

Why did you wear a white Batman suit to Kim and Kanye’s wedding and prom? Tell us the story behind it.

I wore the Batman suit to heighten my experience at the wedding and prom which was fun, but also at the wedding I felt as though I needed to protect everyone there and needed to have the proper gear to do so.

Hey people, get a load of this wack job. Jaden’s going to protect everyone in his flamboyant white Batman costume. Smith looks like the type of person who’d emit a high-pitched shriek like a baby racoon if ever confronted. He’d be the first Batman to wet his pants.

It turns out Jaden Smith is playing us all. Who’s winning or losing? Definitely Jaden. The game he likes to play starts out with him dropping some Jaden-isms for the public, kinda like this.

“Me and my sister started this initiative called Mystery School. It dates back to like ancient Egypt, ancient Greece—like Plato, Pythagoras, all these students had mystery schools. And what they learned in there was sacred. They would learn the math and sciences of that generation, and then they would build the cities and give that energy and that knowledge to the other people. And a lot of stuff they would keep really, really to themselves. Like, you couldn’t say the word dodecahedron, which is just a shape, outside of one of the mystery schools or they would, like, kill you or whatever. Because it was such a sacred shape.”

And then he sits back and watches everyone get all confused by the lotta strangeness he’s laying down, for kicks or whatever. Honestly, considering most kids thrown into fame too early end up on crack or worse, I commend this wacky kid for having the wisdom and sense of humor to have a good time instead, even if he does seem to be jonesing his own town drinking his own Kool-Aid.

“Me and Willow are scientists, so everything for us is a scientific test upon humanity. And luckily we’re put in a position where we can affect large groups of human beings at one time.”

On top of screwing with people for fun, he’s not just your average insanely rich kid laying passively in piles of his parents’ money. Jaden’s into everything. Whether it’s studying 70’s New York City for his role as a graffiti artist in Baz Luhrmann’s new Netflix show The Get Down, sitting in on classes at MIT, designing his own clothes, or building goddamn pyramids for fun, this kid is unapologetically out there. He’s gonna chase his interests, and if you don’t get it, all the better in his book.

While you gotta be real, and realize that this kid has opportunities 99.9999999% of kids on Earth could never imagine, you can’t say he’s not using his insane privilege and wealth in a pretty cool way.

“I rarely go to parties. My whole life is just dedicated on learning and breaking, like, the craziest records of life, and being like one of the craziest human beings to ever exist. That’s me.”

You do you. If you ask him where he sees himself in ten years: the kid’s answer is, of course, classic Jaden Smith.

“No one will know where I am in ten years. They’ll see me pop up, but they’ll be like, ‘Where’d you come from?’ No one will know. No one will know where I’m at. No one will know who I’m with. No one will know what I’m doing. I’ve been planning that since I was like 13.”

I’m so excited to experience his adventures. I am honestly stoked as hell.

“It’ll be kind of like Banksy. But in a different way. More of a social impact. Helping people. But through art installations. It’ll be like, ‘This just happened that helped a bunch of people over here. We don’t know who did it, but these symbols and things were left around, so we can only guess that it’s Jaden and the squad.’ You know what I’m saying? So I’m just dedicating my whole life to helping the world.”

Nice. Keep it weird Jaden. I hope you reach every single weird goal you got. Instead of blowing your trust fund on coke and strippers, you’re gonna use it to confuse people and explore the universe. #Respect.

(H/T GQ)

Jaden Smith, 17, and his girlfriend Sarah Snyder, 21, were seen walking hand in hand in Miami over the weekend. It must suck when your boyfriend has better hair than you do. At that point you just have to unbutton your shorts and walk around with your bikini bottom showing hoping everyone gives you the attention you’re dating Jaden Smith for.

Do you know like that first time you ever smoke pot and you just feel like…ya know…you discovered the meaning of life? With tweets like,

And personal favorite:

Seventeen-year-old Jaden Smith has tried to teach the twittersphere many life lessons, but doesn’t think his journey stops there. He must have gotten ahold of my political philosophy syllabus and after reading The Republic in full, Mr. Smith has sacrificed himself to become our philosopher-king. All hail for there is no one better suited for the task.

From a source close to our philosopher-king:

Jaden sees himself as a modern-day prophet and is working on a collection of essays.

Me too, Jaden, me too.

As your jaw drops and you curse at the Scientological heavens for cursing you, let me remind you that absolutely none of your opinion matters……

I wish I could label Jaden Smith and have it be significant enough to earn a cryptic subtweet in reply. Whatever Jaden Smith is, he has branded himself as one of the very many famous faces of the millennial generation.

As such, his face is a walking advertisement. And as such… it would only make sense for him to be the face of Louis Vuitton’s womenswear campaign. Why get a woman to do what a man can do?

In millennial fashion, son of Will Smith has become very much a champion of gender-fluidity. A label can’t hold this kid down. Debuting via creative director Nicolas Ghesquiere’s Instagram, Smith was:

Clad in an embellished skirt, fringed top and moto jacket that debuted during Paris Fashion Week — and that we’d very much like to get our hands on — Smith looks at ease alongside the female stars of the shoot.

How can I see his campaign if my eyes aren’t real?

Suffice to say, he looks baller as fuck. Cheekbones for the same days as Matt Bomer. He slays whether we want him to or not. Much like other models, he has me suffering from leg envy.

Happy to introduce Jaden Smith @christiaingrey in the new SS16 @louisvuitton ad Campaign photographed by Bruce Weber

A photo posted by 🆖 (@nicolasghesquiere) on Jan 2, 2016 at 3:33pm PST

@sarahdonnealia @riannevanrompaey @jean_campbell #jadensmith @christiaingrey in the new @louisvuitton SS16 ad Campaign photographed by Bruce Weber

A photo posted by 🆖 (@nicolasghesquiere) on Jan 3, 2016 at 6:37am PST

Perhaps a day will come soon where I feel less guilty for craving an inflated price bag from a notoriously homophobic brand.

Will Smith has had a larger than average impact on my understanding and absorption of popular culture. In this way we could call him one of the fathers of the 1990s babies. He was once a rapper, he thrice starred along side Tommy Lee Jones in the iconic Men in Black film series, and for much of my childhood, he was one of the last faces I saw before I closed my eyes at night, falling asleep to syndicated reruns of the Fresh Prince of Bel Air. 

Now, as his children have grown up, he has stepped back from the spotlight quite a bit except for his recent resurgence in the Oscar-snubbed, Concussion. With children as bold and as unapologetically awesome as Willow and Jaden, it’s not difficult to see the artistic and celebratory environment that Will and Jada have created as parents for their children.

In an interview with BBC One’s A-Dot, Will Smith shares at length some very supportive words for son Jaden as he has embarked as the face for Louis Vuitton’s Womenswear collection, has publicly worn dresses and publicly expressed his gender-fluidity. Of his parenting style, Smith shares:

You know, there’s a really powerful internal quality as an artist that as parents we encourage. You gotta get out on the edge, you have to try things, you have to be comfortable doing things that people don’t agree with and you have to be comfortable doing things that you could fail.

I agree.

And Jaden is 100 percent fearless, he will do anything, you know? So as a parent it’s scary, it’s really terrifying, but he is completely willing to live and die by his own artistic decisions and he just doesn’t concern himself with what people think.

Every child, every person deserves to be supported in this way. How much better would the world be if other parents followed in the footsteps set by the Smiths? It’s almost like they think that a person isn’t defined by the clothing they wear, but more by their indecipherable tweets and friendships with other superstar children.

A photo posted by Jaden Smith (@christiaingrey) on Jan 28, 2016 at 8:31am PST

All 17 year olds think they’re the center of the universe and are gonna change the fabric of life as we know it, but few of them get interviewed by British GQ. I support Jaden Smith on all of his #Deep adventures and I wish I could turn all of his pearls of wisdom into an offbeat little necklace.

While it’s awesome of him to be so progressive when it comes to gendered clothing (as in, fuck that shit), he also thinks that the Kardashians are better people for hanging out with him.

“I think I’m just a really big influence on anybody that I’m around, and I feel like that’s why it’s good for me to hang out with all types of different people.”

For one thing, nothing on earth will make the Kardashians suck less. For another, calm down kid. But this kid has no chill. He wants to personally usher in an age of light like some kind of art kid jesus. I, for one, hope he does. I’d like to build more things out of broken chandeliers and recycled soup cans pay fewer student loan bills.

“I’m really working towards just fixing the whole planet Earth. I really just want to create a utopia on this planet. I really want to make it so that people don’t have to die to pay bills and just work to survive. So that they can work to actually live and do the things that they love to do.”

Jaden Smith vs Capitalism. Round one. Fight!

Jaden Smith parlayed his gender fluidity into a makeout session with girlfriend Sarah Snyder at Coachella.

Not 20 feet away was probably a romantic backdrop of a girl popping a squat in the middle of the field because all the toilets were taken.

It’s been awhile since Jaden Smith has relayed any of his nonsense philosophy on the world. Luckily, the Independent has brought to light more bizarro behavior from this very rich child.

In an interview with French Magazine, Numero Homme (which according to my high school French means Number Man), Jaden says he went through a goth phase and was a vampire for a little while. Though many teens go through a figurative vampire phases, Smith insists his was literal. He states,“I was a vampire, for real. I could not expose myself to the sun and I was only wearing black trench coats.”

Under his definition of vampire, I too am apparently undead since I often wear black and my blindly pale skin can’t handle sunshine. Also vampires: most of the people of New York.

It’s unclear if Jaden realizes that the primary vampire trait is sucking blood and being a mythical being. Either way, he grew out of it. He insists he’s no longer a vampire and goes into the sun frequently.

Just to be safe, don’t invite Jaden into your home. Not because he might be a vampire, but because you’re guaranteed to have an insanely annoying conversation.

The post Jaden Smith Was a Vampire, Grew Out of It appeared first on The Blemish.

Jaden Smith lives in a dreamworld. He has superstar parents, a pop star sister, and a tendency to become a vampire. Finally, Jaden saw something that really spoke to his reality. Doctor Strange.

After viewing the film this weekend, Jaden tweeted:

Just Watched Doctor Strange, Im Completely Blown Away, And I'm Going To Dedicate The Rest Of My Life To Those Practices. Thank You

— Jaden (@jaden) November 4, 2016

Smith will now switch from his current life goal of tweeting nonsense meant as philosophy, to studying a magical artform that doesn’t exist. Jaden’s gonna be so pissed when he finds out his Hogwarts application was rejected due to it not being real.

If only we could all live in Jaden’s little world. Believe craziness and make magic with jazz hands. If ignorance is bliss, insanity must be pure nirvana.

pic.twitter.com/bDyQ5jQrGz

— Marvel Studios (@MarvelStudios) November 4, 2016

The post Jaden Smith to Dedicate His Life to Becoming an English Man Doing a Bad American Accent Who Has Magic Hands appeared first on The Blemish.

Westworld is the greatest show of 2016. If you don’t agree, we can’t be friends. Having said that, recovering vampire turned Dr. Strange apprentice Jaden Smith attempts to make everyone hate it with his seemingly Westworld-inspired video for “Fallen”. Which he directed, of course.

Do you want to hear Jaden Smith string a bunch of buzzwords together to form a song of gibberish? Today is your lucky day.

https://youtu.be/TJFO6DyZR50

The post Jaden Smith Directed His Own ‘Westworld’ Music Video appeared first on The Blemish.

We will now do a deep dive into Jaden Smith’s Met Gala appearance. In his grasp, a hand full of his recently cut hair.

Jaden Smith holding his hair at the #MetGala is a look. pic.twitter.com/jAS61EWbLP

— Affinity Magazine (@TheAffinityMag) May 1, 2017

Why?

He brought it as a gift to Kylie Jenner.

He’s making a voodoo doll and came to collect more doll parts.

It’s just Jaden being Jaden.

The post Why Did Jaden Smith Bring a Hand Full of His Hair to the Met Gala? appeared first on The Blemish.

The Smith kids occupy this weird space between brilliant and terrible. They’re American royalty, they’re encouraged to follow their dreams, no one ever really tells them no. That’s why we get such pure forms of human expression like “Whip My Hair.” And now Jaden Smith has a new single.

He’s a teenage kid, he has access to whatever resources he wants, and he really likes Batman. So he got an all-white Batsuit made and just went to town, being himself. On the one hand, it’s kind of stupid. On the other hand, being a teenager is kind of stupid, and this is kind of awesome. Like, if I could do anything I wanted when I was a teenager, writing a song about Batman, getting a custom costume made, and filming an expensive music video would probably be it.

This is not the first time he’s worn his white Batman suit in public. The kid wore that thing to prom. Can you imagine the confidence it would take to wear a white Batman suit to prom? Your dad would have to be the Fresh Prince or something.

And this isn’t even the first time the kid has followed his heart to make a dope music video. Did you catch his tribute to Westworld? Seriously, any bad thought I have about Jaden Smith is due to jealousy and nothing else. The kid is living his best life. He is the hero we deserve.

The post Jaden Smith is White Batman appeared first on The Blemish.

Jaden Smith is no longer on Netflix due to the cancellation of The Get Down, but Jaden Smith will soon return to Netflix thanks to a new anime show.

The tease started with Smith posting the following picture on his Instagram:

That’s Lil Uzi Vert and don’t let anyone tell you different. The caption is “@Neoyokio.” Clicking the link takes you to an Instagram page of a nine picture animated city with the bio “The greatest city in the world.”

Vampire Weekend singer Ezra Koenig added fuel to the fire with the following tweets:

things are bubbling in the sea beneath 14th street pic.twitter.com/wIHzsnJt5c

— Ezra Koenig (@arzE) June 11, 2015

That’s a post from 2015. Ezra bumped the post by issuing this response:

NEO YOKIO IS THE GREATEST CITY IN THE WORLD. to Studio Deen, Production IG, Jaden Smith, Kazuhiro Furuhashi & many more pic.twitter.com/dI88h7ZhPa

— Ezra Koenig (@arzE) September 5, 2017

As you can see, there’s some show about Neo Yokio, which is the greatest city in the world, starring an animated Lil Uzi Vert. In case that wasn’t enough evidence for you, a Twitter user decided to ask “you made an anime with jaden and mero?” To which Ezra responded with:

pic.twitter.com/QRD7aqOQeC

— Ezra Koenig (@arzE) September 5, 2017

That pretty much confirms that yes, Jaden Smith, Ezra Koenig, and others made some type of anime. The clip shows Lil Uzi Vert, voiced by Jaden Smith, talking to some sales guy, voiced by The Kid Mero. The clip gives nothing away, except that Lil Uzi Vert has trouble picking out his own clothes and must stay #onbrand.

However, if you click the photos on Neoyokio’s Instagram page, more information is revealed. Here’s what the captions say:

neo yokio is the greatest city in the world

caprese? like the salad?

it’s been two weeks & I still can’t believe she’s really gone

the sea beneath 14th street

just as this calm pool of water sits at the center of a chaotic metropolis, you, too, have an inner reservoir of peace and tranquility

who cares what time it is when the future’s an interminable abyss of wackness?

#1 most eligible bachelor & demon slayer

neo yokio | netflix

EAT YOUR TIRAMISU

Alright, so maybe more information isn’t really revealed. Whatever, I’m slightly intrigued by the possibility of animated Lil Uzi Vert changing his clothes like his hoes.

The post Jaden Smith Brings the Greatest City in the World to Netflix appeared first on The Blemish.

Last night was the MET Gala, where stars compete to see who can be the flashiest idiot. Jaden Smith is always a strong contender with his past dates including his sister and the dreadlocks he had cut off. This year Smith’s date was his gold record certification for his single “Icon.”

Entendi. Jaden Smith leva exibe Certificado de Ouro para todos no tapete do #MetGala. pic.twitter.com/U1p5FgMe6f

— Tracklist (@PortalTracklist) May 8, 2018

Next year I expect he’ll bring a giant Toblerone. Possibly a giant robot that will pretend to be interested when he tries and fails to sound as deep as Kanye West.

pic.twitter.com/uRoXHXHDve

— Neo Yokio (@NeoYokio) October 1, 2017

Smith’s stunt was a big hit on social media.

Jaden Smith bringing his gold record as a date to the met gala is like me bringing my one Tumblr shitpost that went viral to Red Lobster

— Shel’s BBQ & Foot Massage (@unfocusedmind) May 8, 2018

all i’m saying is jaden smith is a cornball lmao im not saying he’s a bad rapper but he’s corny af and like drew said he re used a poops “bar” 4 different times in one album

— nick johnston (@JohnstonNqj) May 8, 2018

I'm a little hurt that @officialjaden chose his gold album over my new Michael Jordan painting as his date to the Met Gala. pic.twitter.com/SNPAe7sYar

— Sports Painter (@sportspainter) May 8, 2018

I feel like Jaden Smith’s gold record didn’t really dress that well.#MetGala

— Leakin’ Scott Boxenbaum (@scottbox) May 8, 2018

This is basically the best thing a celebrity has done since the time James Franco took that anime body pillow clubbing.

I’m not saying that Jaden Smith lives his life like he’s a parody of a celebrity on 30 Rock, but… yeah, that’s exactly how Jaden Smith lives his life.

The post Jaden Smith Is Dating His Own Gold Record appeared first on The Blemish.

Jaden Smith is just an icon living. And some of his most iconic moments came in the form of tweets, where Jaden wasn’t afraid to say what no one was thinking.

Speaking to The Huffington Post, Smith explained some of his all-time cryptic posts.

How Can Mirrors Be Real If Our Eyes Aren't Real

— Jaden (@jaden) May 2, 2013

Smith’s response:

“This one comes from a study that a scientist was saying, that the way that the eyes perceive reality is not the way we actually see it. So, like, we can only see three base colors, but there’s so much more on the electromagnetic spectrum of light that we could see, but our eyes are just not capable of seeing, which brought me to the realization that what we see on an everyday basis is not actually what’s there. It’s actually only what we can take in.

“And I also took in another study that … our eyes are kind of like mirrors in a sense to where they perceive things and then they flip. We take in the information upside down and then the brain flips it right side up so that we can see it right side up … and I was like, if we take in the raw visual information upside down and mirrors portray things in reverse, then they’re not real. We’re living in the Matrix.”

I disagree that we are living in the Matrix. That movie ruled. Reality is kinda trash.

I Am Not A Human And I Don't Speak English

— Jaden (@jaden) May 30, 2018

Personally, I liked this better when it was a Lil Wayne lyric. Here’s what Jaden said:

“That’s true! That’s true! Because I’m not gonna be categorized as a human. Oh, humans are supposed to do this or act like this or people are supposed to act like this or people are supposed to be this. I’m my own thing. Don’t judge me off some standards that were made up before I was born. I’m doing my own thing.”

Yeah, he’s just wrong here. He’s not a human because of his actions, he’s a human because of his DNA and skeletal makeup. And he does speak English.

The Biggest Flex Anyone Will Ever Have Is Dying.

— Jaden (@jaden) September 4, 2015

Smith explains:

“Yeah, yeah, yeah, that was a sad one. But it’s true. Because when someone leaves, that’s when everybody starts to care about them.”

I’m not even mad at this. He’s right.

If A Cup Cake Falls From A Tree How Far Away Will It Be From Down. #Jupiter

— Jaden (@jaden) August 29, 2014

Sometimes, a senseless tweet is a senseless tweet:

“That one? I really don’t know where my head was at with that one. Yeah, I love that one. That was like an abstract painting in the form of words. The visuals that get created in your mind when you say that sentence, I created those visuals in your mind.”

Thanks?

The More Time You Spend Awake The More Time You Spend Asleep.

— Jaden (@jaden) February 13, 2015

Maybe?

“I mean that’s just a fact. But like, I just fucking need to … as soon as I say it, then it becomes like a novelty thing. Then it becomes something that’s super funny. It’s super true though.”

This one hurt my brain because I tried to incorporate math and I suck at math. I’m sure there’s a scientific study out there on this.

A lot Of My Tweets Will Come True In 2018

— Jaden (@jaden) January 1, 2018

He wasn’t wrong.

“I’ve tweeted about a lot of things that have to do with myself musically or creatively or saying, ‘Oh here’s my plans or here’s what I’m gonna do.’ I’ve hinted at starting a vision clothing line. I’ve hinted at going on major tours,” he said.  “One thing that’s coming true is me going on tour with J. Cole. I’ve never said specifically that I wanted to be on tour with J. Cole, but I’ve always said that I do love J. Cole, and I want to be on tour, and I wanted to be in different arenas and play Staples Center. I’m sure even if I didn’t tweet it, I have an internal circle of homies where I talk about things like this. I’ve talked about performing at Staples Center, performing my new album on tour.”

Unfortunately, don’t expect more crazy Jaden tweets. He’s not as active on social media due to criticism.

Criticism Can Only Hurt If It Is Knives.

The post Jaden Smith Decodes His Non-Human Tweets appeared first on The Blemish.

Jaden Smith had no time for TMZ and their questions about Colin Kaepernick and Nike. 

Smith states that he loves Kaepernick, but he’s not wearing Nike. Why? Because he’s signed to New Balance.

Yeah, that’s a pretty good reason. Then again, Dana White and the UFC have a deal with Reebok and he was caught wearing all Nike gear not too long ago. I’m sure we’ll catch Jaden in some Nike gear down the line 

My favorite part of this whole video is Jaden riding a scooter to get away from the TMZ guy. How the hell did the TMZ guy even keep up with him? Either this dude is in great shape and probably deserves a raise or he had a scooter of his own. 

Stop bothering these celebrities at the airport, TMZ. Especially if they’re using a motorized vehicle to get the hell away from you. Or at least ask them better questions. 

Through Jaden’s deal with New Balance, he’s developed a line called G-Style. Jaden told GQ that his inspirations are the line are Tyler, The Creator, Batman, and Poseidon. All three sound 100 percent like Jaden Smith answers.

Jaden famously wore a Batman suit to his prom and to Kim and Kanye’s wedding, feeling the need to protect everyone there. I’m sure the 50 security guards they hired for their wedding were no doubt thankful that teenage Jaden Smith was there in his Batman suit. 

Nike and Colin Kaepernick made headlines this week when the two partnered for Nike’s 30th Anniversary campaign. A bunch of white people and angry military types who still think this is about the flag got back at the company by burning their Nike gear that they had already paid for. 

They sure showed them. Could have just bought New Balance gear. Jaden Smith will never let you down.

The post Jaden Smith Won’t Buy Nike Clothing to Wear or Burn appeared first on The Blemish.

It’s been 22 years and it’ll be another 22 more before I let Will Smith forget he once embarrassed himself by getting jiggy with it.

The post Will Smith Got Jiggy With It With Jaden at Coachella appeared first on The Blemish.

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